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Thoughts of the day2 min read

Strong Woman: Beware

Are you often defined as a strong woman? Keeley Taverner shares 10 honest observations on the paradox of the label and the cost of always coping.

Strong Woman: Beware

Strong woman: beware

Strong Woman

Are you often defined as a strong woman? Do you embrace or loathe this title? Does the strong woman struggle with vulnerability? Or do people always assume you’ll be alright?

10 observations about the paradox of being labelled as a ‘strong woman’:

  • Strong women intimidate weak, insecure men—could this be why they're vulnerable to narcissists? Those cunning personalities who parade as confident and self-assured. But in reality, she was seduced by a well-rehearsed façade.
  • Strong women are considered alpha females, and our feminine energy can be compromised by our drive. Strong woman, it's okay to feel weak and be vulnerable. It's okay to ask for help.
  • People don't tend to think strong women have needs. They assume they'll always be okay. Plus, people can't tolerate us being vulnerable. Often, the strong woman is isolated and feels alone.
  • The strong woman is most vulnerable when she falls in love. Love and vulnerability go hand in hand. She must exercise caution, wisdom, and not move at breakneck speed. She has a lot to lose.
  • Strong women can struggle with 'negative' emotions; they loathe feeling weak. In fact, they hate it and often channel their energy into careers. At times of great success, she may well be in agonising pain.
  • Strong women struggle to let go; they like to be in control. At times, this can be problematic in intimate relationships where they're most exposed.
  • Strong woman, remember, they see your glory—they don't know the story.
  • Strong women aren't invincible. They cry. They hurt. They get down. They feel, and it's okay. Embrace all of your emotions. They're often baffled by the paradox of being strong. Why are they so often rejected? Yes, they made lemonade out of lemons. But what else were they meant to do? Lay down and die... oh no, not I. I will survive.
  • Strong women desperately seek an alpha male. They would love to be less driven, less in control. They would love to be taken care of, to have someone else be in the driving seat. But so often, they have been tremendously let down.
  • A strong woman's passion, drive, and determination can move mountains. But her success intimidates, evokes jealousy and ill feeling from others. It is essential to her well-being that she has a tight, trusted circle of like-minded folk.

Strong woman you're NOT alone

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Keeley Taverner
Keeley Taverner
BACP-accredited psychotherapist · Key for Change · Marlow, Uxbridge and online

Psychotherapist and founder of Key for Change, with over twenty years working with narcissistic dynamics, including thirteen in the criminal justice system.

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